Thoughts on Thoughts
Fear and Frustration
When I had my amputation surgery in May of 2025, one of my doctors estimated I would receive my prosthetic in 6-8 weeks; another gave an extended time frame of closer to 6 months. My logical, Vulcan side knew full well it was impossible for anyone to know exactly when I could expect to walk again, but my impatient, emotional human side wanted to throw a temper tantrum right there on the dirty hospital floor.
I was frustrated, angry, and frightened. I allowed this fear to overwhelm my thoughts, and I was full of so many “What Ifs”:
What if I can’t go back to my job?
What if I have to sell my car?
What if insurance doesn’t cover my needs?
What if I just can’t do this? Maybe I’m not strong enough.
Framing my thoughts with “what if” causes me to start panicking. My heart rate grows rapid, my breathing constricts, my palms sweat, and my brain enters a state of disregulation - the fight or flight mode that accompanies elevated cortisol.
Reframing My Thoughts
It’s at this point when I must call on God. I recall one of my favorite verses, 1 Peter 5:7: “Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” When I ask God to lift the burden of my anxieties, I find that He does. He gives me the peace that passes all understanding, and I’m able to breathe and redirect my thoughts.
Instead of asking in that tremulous voice, “what if?” I assert with a strong voice and proud shoulders WHAT IS. Instead of questioning the uncertain future, I announce the verifiable present. I become grounded in both facts and faith. It looks something like this:
What is true? God’s love for me and His perfect timing.
What is certain? I’m alive, a child of God, and He has plans for me.
What is my response? I have nothing but praise and gratitude in my heart. My pain is gone and I have learned invaluable lessons from this ordeal.
What is next? I don’t know all the details, but I know God is in control, and I can trust that just as He did not bring the Israelites through the wilderness to die of starvation, He did not put me through this experience to simply abandon me.
What a change in attitude! Simply shifting from “What if” to “What is” makes a tremendous difference in everything from your countenance to your self-esteem.
And the attitude is contagious! Trust me, I’ve had countless people at the gym or grocery store praise me for my courage, attitude, energy, or effort. They say I inspire them. Of course, these comments are immensely gratifying - but I’d be remiss if I did not praise Jesus for His grace and mercy in renewing my soul, and credit the carnivore lifestyle with strengthening my physical body and freeing my brain from food noise.
I still have days when I allow the dark cloud of “what if?” to loom on the horizon, and pepper the landscape with torrential downpours. Like anyone, I can succumb to the negative thoughts. That’s part of being a human, part of being fallible - but over the years I can say with confidence I have become much better at seeking out God and friends for support when times are tough. Reframing my thoughts is an exercise I need to practice just like my bicep curls and chest presses, and I encourage you to do the same.
